Tuesday, July 2, 2013

MY Thoughts On Being a Pro-Choice Christian

Last week I read a post on a blog that just didn’t sit well with me.  I tried to ignore it and just go on about my business.  I couldn’t.  Initially, I was somewhat shocked by the hatred I saw the author share in her post.  After I wrote a heartfelt and respectful comment on her blog (that went unpublished), and tried to reach out to her as a friend through email and was met with condescension, I had a better understanding of the type of person I was dealing with.

I had been mulling around the thought of publishing my thoughts on abortion here since they had not been published on the site, but I was hesitant to start any drama.  Then I published my post on my journey to Faith yesterday and the other blogger flew off the handle calling me a “bitch” on Facebook and saying I’m not a Christian because of the pro-choice thoughts I had shared with her.

A few passive-aggressive Facebook posts later, and I’ve decided I’ll share her words and mine and let you be the judge.

NOTE:  These words are the words of the other blogger as posted on her blog (a blog no longer available to the public).  All misspellings, grammatical errors, swear words, hatred and other nonsense is straight from her blog.
I DO NOT SHARE HER OPINIONS ON THIS SUBJECT!
If you doubt that this is what she posted, you can view a screenshot of her post in it’s entirety here.

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

ABORTIONS VS LIFE
I DONT SUPPORT ABORTIONS. 

THAT'S KILLING. 


1st Time I heard about abortions was in a health occupation class I was in. The teacher who was a nurse explained to us how this procedure happened and all. Once she was done we were all in tears. 


I havent ever had a child of my own before but I still have a heart. A beating heart inside of me and I have a mind also that tells me killing is wrong and abortions are wrong. 


It's wrong on so many levels. There's a living soul inside of a person and you're gonna kill it. IT'S FUCKING WRONG. 


I'm at a loss of words really that people want to make abortions legal and think it's ok to abort at week 20. 


I looked up what happens at Week 20 and this is what I found.

***Babycenter animated video of fetal development***
 
Your baby weighs about 10 1/2 ounces now. He's also around 6 1/2 inches long from head to bottom and about 10 inches from head to heel — about the size of a banana. (For the first 20 weeks, when a baby's legs are curled up against his torso and hard to measure, measurements are taken from the top of his head to his bottom — the "crown to rump" measurement. After 20 weeks, he's measured from head to toe.)

He's swallowing more these days, which is good practice for his digestive system. He's also producing meconium, a black, sticky by-product of digestion. This gooey substance will accumulate in his bowels, and you'll see it in his first soiled diaper (some babies pass meconium in the womb or during delivery). 


This is after 20 weeks but just the thought of someone killing a precious angel inside of the womb and just killing it period brings tears to my eyes. 
 
How can women have abortions?  
What goes thru their minds and thru their heads?  
THIS IS THE DEVIL 
 
This is not the kind of people we want running our country by no means. 
 
When the U.S. is for Abortion? When he's for killing a human being? A living thing inside of another living thing? 
 
SOMETHING IS FUCKING WRONG HERE! 
 
Hell he has a wife and a 2 daughters and he's for fucking abortion. 
 
and he studders the whole time during the video that I watched where a preacher asked him about it. 
 
How can so many people Support someone who's for Abortion? 
 
THIS SHIT MAKES ME FURIOUS.
 
You want something killed. 
 
KILLED THESE IDIOTS WHO THINK KILLING A UNBORN CHILD IS RIGHT. 
 
That's what you call people who believe in the Devil and dont believe in God.
Who live for the devil and not for God. 
 
Who thinks the devil should rule the world and not GOD!
 
 
Now, the response I made on her blog that she refused to publish (I’ve added italics, underlining and bolding to emphasize my intended message in this comment’s text.  Otherwise it is unchanged.):
(Other Blogger's Name):
I wasn't going to comment, but I can't really get this post off my mind. You've stated many times since I've been reading your blog that you are going to state your mind and only want friends who do the same. I hope you really meant that. Here are my personal thoughts on this post.

I can see why abortion is such a hard thing to understand. It's a horrible choice to have to make. I've been in the place to consider making this choice; I was a pregnant 16-year-old whose boyfriend insisted she get an abortion or go without his help. That's an agonizing place to be. Ultimately, I was lucky because my parents supported me and I had the luxury of making the "easy" decision to continue my pregnancy and become a mother.

At nearly the same time I was making that decision, a friend was making the other decision. The HARD one; the one where you don't really know if you'll regret it for the rest of your life or if you will be grateful that you had the option and access to a safe abortion. That decision she was making certainly wasn't an easy one, but it was hers to make. It wasn't mine to make, it wasn't yours to make and it certainly wasn't a stranger in Washington (or anywhere else) to make.

You ask "How can women have abortions?" and "What goes thru their minds and thru their heads?" I think that women have abortions because it is the right (and sometimes only) decision in THEIR LIFE. Some women make the choice because of their life circumstances, some because of their own health, some because of the health of the child they carry, some because of the circumstances under which they became pregnant, or the point in their lives when they became pregnant.

I don't really have an answer for your second question, but I'm saddened by the fact that you seem to believe that women who choose abortion have something wrong with them or are possessed by the devil. I'm saddened that you seem to think that anyone, including our president, who supports abortion is possessed by the devil.
 
I support abortion. I support a woman's right to choose for herself what is right for her, her body, and her health. I do not believe that I, you, or anyone else has the right to restrict access to abortion if that is the decision a woman is making for herself. It's not the choice I would make, but I don't believe that it's my place to make decisions for anyone other than myself. I believe that even if abortion were outlawed it would continue to exist (as it always has) but would be more dangerous and more expensive. I believe outlawing abortion will not save lives. I do not believe abortion is about someone WANTING "something killed".
 
If you genuinely believe that by taking this stance I "live for the devil and not for God", I would hope that instead of calling for my murder and calling me an idiot that you would pray for me and pray for everyone who thinks like me. I would hope that instead of thinking it's OK to call for the murder of anyone who thinks like me that you would pray to God to help you understand us. I think that's what a true follower of Christ would do. The Bible tells us to leave the judgment of fellow man to God. Are you a follower of the Bible and of Christ? The bible COMMANDS us to love one another as God has loved us. Is that what you're doing here?
 
I hope that you will read my words and that they will soften your heart. I do not desire to change your stance on abortion; I believe you have the right to believe it is wrong. Just as I have the right to believe as I do.
 
With much love and respect,


I am extremely offended that another Christian would come right out and say that I am not a true believer in God because I believe in a woman’s right to control what happens to her own body.

I would NEVER pressure another woman to seek an abortion.  And I would NEVER tell another woman that she shouldn’t seek an abortion if that is what she feels is best for her.  It’s simply not my place.

Do I feel sad when I think about babies that might have been born if they hadn’t been aborted?  Sometimes.  And then I remember that women know what’s best for their own lives.  Other times I think perhaps an abortion has saved a child from a life of abuse or starvation or poverty or all sorts of atrocities we privileged people can’t imagine.

What I KNOW is that there’s no easy answer when it comes to abortion.  What I KNOW is that instead of judging each other, calling each other names, and attacking each other we should be propping our sisters up when they need it.

I did some research on being a prochoice Christian and found some interesting articles I would like to share with you:
 
Now then, those are my thoughts on this subject today.  I’m always happy to read comments and I certainly don’t expect everyone to agree with me!  HOWEVER, if you’re going to comment, please refrain from cursing.  I will delete all comments that contain the "F" word or any other word I find offensive.
Thanks!

21 comments:

  1. It's really unfortunate that someone who claims they are Christian, would speak to you in such a horrible way. Don't Christians talk of "love" and "praying for others"?? Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I also find it funny that she would refuse to post your comment. I've also had people not post my comments, because I've pointed out things to make their argument invalid. I used to follow Night Owl Venting, but stopped a long time ago because I found that all she does is talk about hate in her blogs. It's too bad, but yes she's entitled to that. Good for you for showing everyone your side of the story, but I hope it doesn't mean more backlash from her.

    Celena
    My Stay at Home Mama Life

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  2. Proud of you for sharing both sides. And thank you founding fathers for freedom of speech!

    She is the evil she speaks against. It's shows here true self when she calls for the murder of those with a difference of opinion or lifestyle.

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  3. Interesting that she would respond like that. I think the note you sent her was very heartfelt and diplomatic. And you said right in there that you didn't desire to change her views on abortion. It's so hard to gauge some people's reactions to things! Odd.

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  4. Wow!! I can't come from a "Christian" place since I'm not religious and therefore hold no religious views on the subject. As far as abortion goes, it's none of my business or anyone else's for that matter. Abortion is medical and medical should be left between your doctor and yourself. Now, I personally could never have one, even if the baby was deformed or sick. However, that's me. I imagine if I was raped and ended up pregnant then I would probably want one cause who wants to carry that around or force a child to live a life.knowing they are a "rape baby". I believe you should feel however you want about it but don't push your ideas on others, get mad at them when they disagree or get hateful about it. I do believe she should have posted your comment and if she had a problem then she should have pushed it off and said "we'll, that's how you feel and that's ok, this is how I feel and that's ok too". That way, a blog post war wouldn't be going on and no one would have butt hurt feelings....but that's just my thought on it :) also, If you're going to post a touchy subject, then you should be prepared for people to oppose your thoughts, I mean, not everyone thinks the same. As bloggers I think we of all people should be use to that, sometimes in life it's just better to smile and nod your head.

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  5. Iam also pro-choice, but definitely not pro-abortion. I thought she only showed hatred, not Christ-like love. I would never have an abortion in a normal circumstance, who knows how I would feel if I were raped. I have four wonderful children who have been raised in love. I don't know what everyone else is going through. I think it is more uncaring to bring a child into a life where they aren't loved and cherished. I think you will find that a lot of the murders Nd atrocities are committed by those unwanted children.


    I'm glad you are standing up for yourself. Everyone's opinion is important.

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  6. I found your blog yesterday and like most new readers are anxious to see what you talk about. Seeing this post is discouraging. I don't understand why it matters so much to publicize about a dispute you and another blogger had. I understand blogs are all about venting and sharing your beliefs about topics. Which is fine. If she chooses not to publish your comments then let it be. Its not worth it to make a scene that someone else refuses to publish your comment.



    Putting down another human being on your blog just because they chose to not publish your comment is catty. She does have a strong opinion about not supporting abortion. Its her blog. I see you wont publish certain comments for your own reasons as well. Blogs are a personal space and can be controlled by the reader. Both of you are taking sides to a very very controversial topic. This post makes me sick inside that it is such a big deal to humiliate someone else online.

    Buck up and get over the fact not everyone is going to like what you have to say

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for your comment, Nicole!

      I just want to share that it's not my intent to put down Laney. In fact, it was my original intention to only share snippets of her post along with my take on them. However, after the facebook posts yesterday calling me a bitch and saying I'm not a Christian (as well as being mad that I didn't name her in my post), I have chosen to go this route. It might not be the right choice, but c'est la vie!

      This post really isn't about the fact that she didn't publish my comment; it's about sharing my thoughts on being a pro-choice Christian. If I had addressed the topic the way I had originally intended, I'm sure it would have irritated her as well. Too bad, so sad.

      I hope you'll stick around and see that it's not always like this here. Today it is, but I've said my piece and now I'm moving on. Again, thanks for your comment!

      Delete
    2. I completely agree, Nicole. As a follower of this blog, it seems as if there is so much negativity that I can't even read it anymore. Originally, Laney wrote something you disagreed with. Okay, so if you're not trying to change her beliefs on abortion, why send her an email? Why not just let it go?

      When I disagree with things & people, I just leave. them. alone. To each his own. I like to read blogs that don't even talk about drama, what someone said that 'hurt their feelings' or other petty girl situations.

      True Christians do not tell other Christians how to act. But instead, they focus on bettering themselves to return to Him. It's interesting how there are comments on here from so called Christians that are calling this Laney girl pure evil. Because that...is judgmental and pure evil in itself.

      Have a nice day.

      Delete
  7. I can't put myself into the "Christian" category. However as a mother, a grandmother and a human being. I am of the belief every woman has the right to choose what is best for her in every situation. Actually I am of the belief every human has the right to do what is best for their body in every situation, especially considering my own medical issues.

    I find the opinions and statements from the other blogger in question to come off as immature and close minded. I'm not sure if I follow that person or not, but if so I will no longer. Thank you for bringing this issue out, and for not allowing yourself to be silenced by the name calling and hatred being spouted.

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  8. I don't consider myself pro-choice or pro-life. I think of myself as anti-abortion. I don't believe in it and think that once there is a heartbeat (between 5-6 weeks) that they should not happen. (And don't get me started on abortions past the 1st trimester). HOWEVER, I don't call others murderers. I think many are misled. I used to be very pro-choice. At that time, I thought we were talking about a cluster of cells. I learned different, especially when I was pregnant the first time. I do NOT believe in outlawing abortion, yet, and forcing women into back alleys again. Abortion has existed since the beginning of time.

    My belief is that we need to educate more women on their cycles and on various ways to prevent pregnancy, including the Fertility Awareness Method. We need to make sure all women have good health care so that they can afford to bring a child to term, whether they keep the baby or give it up for adoption. We need better systems of support for women in abusive relationships. I could go on. Until we set up a society where women have the necessary knowledge and resources, we can't outlaw abortion. That's just my thoughts.

    As to the rest, I get where you are coming from and why you wanted to refute the comments.

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  9. Cristyl, I am personally saddened when I see such negativity, all in God's name. I hate to say that, that kind of thing is what kept me from church for so many years. I, too, am pro-choice and a follower of Christ and therefore it is not my place to judge, anyone! No, I could not have chosen the option, but for some it is the only choice. My oldest sister had to make that difficult decision as a young woman, and she could never have children after that, because it was a back alley abortion. I would imagine that most of us, who are pro-choice believe less in the abortion, and more about a woman's choice to make for her own body!
    Many blessings to you Cristyl!

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  10. part of her problem is that she thinks being pro-choice means you are "for" abortions. I'm not for abortions, I don't think everyone should go have one! I just believe in a woman's right to choose.

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    Replies
    1. "He who passively accepts evil is as much involved in it as he who helps to perpetrate it. He who accepts evil without protesting against it is really cooperating with it."- Martin Luther King Jnr.

      Delete
  11. Most people I know who are pro-choice are not pro-abortion. We support a woman's right to make a personal decision. It is not our right to make decisions or to judge other people. True Christians are not throwing stones; they understand that only He will judge them.

    Now, get over this petty bickering and get on with your life.

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  12. That girl has issues. It just infuriates me that people can be so freaking narrow minded. Yeah let's make a girl rapped or molested by a family member have a baby. Let's deny a girl the ability to access the morning after pill because the condom broke. It's always a great idea that a women living on the streets and addicted to drugs to make them have a baby. It is a personal choice. How do we not know that this is God's plan? That instead of God telling us to stand outside abortion clinics with signs and cause emotionally distraught women more pain and scars by calling them names, God is telling us to sympathetic compassionate, and understanding. If you ever talk to this girl again please pass along the following to her "Instead of criticizing and calling someone names because they don't feel the same way you do abortion and that passionate about it pro-life then. get off your computer and put your foul mouth to good use. EDUCATE women and girls on SEX. I am pretty sure if your as Christian as you think you are, you probably have your head so far up your ass you probably thinrk that people shouldn't have sex until they are married. So in a round about way your delusional beliefs just promotes abortion, by putting these out dated ideals that marriage is the answer and no sex. Do some research and you will find that in countries, like Netherlands had an abortion rate of 8.8 per 1,000 in 2006 compared to 14.8 per 1,000 in the United States in 2007. THAT is because they actually educate. Your stupid ass rant against my friend goes to show just how stupid you are, because if you truly knew her you would be truly humbled by the sacrifices choices she made as a teenager. Until you feel the need to judge any WOMEN on what they believe or choices in life they must make. You walk a mile in their shoes YOU HAVE no right to judge them. I am sure God is really proud of you for being such a non-judgmental and sympathetic person. Life is not black and white and you shouldn't be so arrogant as to really think that anyone that read the shit that you posted changed the heart or minds of anyone. You cross the line when you or the government tells me what can and can not do with my body. THE BODY GOD GAVE ME...not politicians. When I die and meet God I will have no problem telling him that I stood up for what he gave me FREE WILL. If people would just stop pushing their moral beliefs and religion on everyone else and just treat each other with love and respect the world would be a much better place. Your part of the problem by being so mean and hateful just because someone believed that women should have what God gave them Free Will something that you want to take away because you know better than he does. ....as far as for the "life" they are "killing" How do you not know God has a plan for that Mom who does have the abortion? I know you can't hear me considering your head is still up your ass and so busy right fighting it went way over your head"

    Sorry that girl just made me very mad and very defensive of you. I just can't believe how stupid and self-absorbed people can be.

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    Replies
    1. Aww...I love that you're so passionate and educated on this subject. And that you care about me, too!

      Delete
  13. I can not say that I agree with pro-choice, let me rephrase, I agree that women should have a choice, but I think the choice is rather or not to have sex in the first place, What I fail to understand is why when abortion laws are brought up it has to be one or the other, either completely for or completely against, there is never a grey area, and I truly think there needs to be, I personally believe that abortions should be legal in certain circumstances such as rape or a major birth defect,or risk of the mother or baby dying, personally I wouldn't have one unless my baby had no chance of survival, but I can understand why women would for the other reasons, however I do not believe they should be legal as a form of birth control which is what they have become. There are other options available, and in this day and age there are far too many forms of birth control to have to resort to abortion purely because you do not want to have a baby.

    As a woman who can no longer have children and not by any choice of my own it saddens me how many babies are killed every year. The statistics of how many women later suffer from depression after having an abortion saddens me as well.

    I always ask the question" "When are humans pronounced dead?" the answer I most often receive is "When their hearts stop beating" So on that, wouldn't a baby be considered alive as soon as their heart is beating? and if so Why would that not be considered murder?

    I will not say that I do not judge people who have abortions because that would be a lie, If a woman has had more than one abortion due to just not wanting to have a baby, or be pregnant I do judge them, I judge them in different ways for some I am sad, and for others I am angry, for instance I have a family member that has had 16 abortions, and for no reason other than she didn't want a baby, to me that is insane and it angers me, and I say more than one because I realize that as humans we all make mistakes, but the goal of mistakes would be to learn from them. The thing is I do not go around calling people out for having abortions, I do occasionally voice my opinion on my blog, because it is my blog and I am allowed to have my own opinions, as others are entitled to theirs.

    With all of that being said, I think that spewing hate is completely unnecessary, and not very Christian like, it is one of the main things that turned me away from Christianity.

    I too also used to follow her blog, however stopped because she wrote far too much in a hateful manner

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  14. wow. Just coming across this while blog hopping. This is always such a hot topic. I do believe abortion is wrong. One of the ten commandments is 'do not kill.' Taking a life is never a good solution unless another life is endangered. A point was made earlier about educating women on birth control, healthy relationships, etc. If people (women AND men) were better educated about their own bodies and reproduction - if sex was not so glamorized in our society - abortion would be in less demand. It's a bigger problem than just an unplanned pregnancy. As Christians, we are called to love one another and be respectful. Only God can judge the human heart. It's good to stand for life, but hating those who see things differently is just as misguided.

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  15. Thank you so much for sharing this post and the articles! I have been searching for reliable and foundation articles to support being a Christian and Pro-Choice. I am saddened that some members of my own family--traditional conservative Republicans--have lashed out so harshly against my Pro-choice beliefs. They have resorted to calling me names like "baby-killer" and said things like "I will pray for your misguided and errant thinking" and have even distanced themselves from me because "I am beyond Godly reasoning." Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts; it means a lot to me to have other Christians supporting my Pro-Choice views.

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  16. I'm not sure exactly where I stand on abortion, and I don't really feel like getting that whole argument that's raging in my head over my moral stance. BUT I do know that this country is FILLED with unwanted, neglected children. I think that if all the Christians that screamed out against abortion would get spend their time and energy focusing on the children that have already been born, we would be in a much better place.

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