The Trials and Tribulations of the Un-Potty-Trained

So, you know I’m a stay-at-home Mom, right?  And if you’ve ever spent much time with a toddler, you know how easy it would be to kinda lose your mind if all you ever did was try to train a toddler to act like a human being with manners, right?

Yeaaaaaah…so that’s kinda the point where I am.  Losing.My.Mind.  Seriously.  Like, so bad that I am regularly amazed at the crazy stuff I do to entertain my semi-wild-child (and myself).

Today, it’s songs to encourage him to use the toilet.  We’re reaching the point where some serious effort to accomplish this potty-training thing needs to happen.  I don’t think we’re at the point where I’m ready to push for it to happen, but that point is nearing.  For now, I’m employing several approaches to encourage Buddy to think going potty is a better idea than going in the diaper.  I’m not so sure it’s working very well…

Some days I take the “reverse psychology” approach – wherein I beg my son to never grow up and always stay a baby.  He’s MY little baby and he can never, ever, not in a million years grow up.  And don’t you dare ever quit wearing diapers! *wink, wink* (That’s the reverse psychology part, but don’t tell him!)

Yeah.  That stuff isn’t working.  I don’t think he understands reverse psychology yet.

Some days I take the “I’m so sick of this stinky sh*t, literally” approach.  Wherein, I lecture my son about how stinky and gross it is to poop in his diaper and then expect me to wipe his butt clean.  He repeats “Eewwwww, Poop!” and “Yuck!” while I lecture.  I tend to do this mostly on days when he comes to me with fingers covered in his own excrement…cause that sh*t just pushes me over the edge!

I don’t think that’s working, either.

Other days I try to make him feel guilty by fake-crying about how much I hate poopy diapers.  He generally looks at me like I’m crazy.

He’s not buying it.

Today, I’m singing creative original tunes about going potty!  Here’s a few examples:

• Poop First, Wipe Second (A practical, yet fun tune/rap)
• Poopin’ on the Potty is GREAT! (A happy, celebratory little ditty)
• Poop, poop, poop in the potty! (To the tune of Row, Row, Row Your Boat)
• Pootay in the USA (a la Miley Cyrus style!)

So, there you go…a peek into my warped little mind.  And just for funsies, this is the post-kerplunk smile of pride Buddy had today!

So maybe serenading is the way to go.